8 – 10 Sept

The Geoff Allan Band  @ Paris Jazz Club (9 Sept) – HAILed as the ‘Paul Kelly of jazz’ tho not surprising in this weather.
Anthony Callea w/ the MSO @ Hamer Hall (8 Sept) – I have a crush on his husband. Ohh maybe this is why the gays shouldn’t be allowed to get married. Cos of straight women. Now I get it?? (I don’t get it)
Mt Macedon Garden Lovers Fair @ Mt Macedon (7-8 Sept) – Macedon’s bushy gardens are fair and lovable. And so it is written and so it shall be.
Body transformation @ Melb (9th Sept) – positive body image is literally the biz.
Biennale of Australian Art @ Ballarat (21 Sep – 6 Nov) –  featuring costumes from ‘Round The Twist, a collage of pics of Graham Kennedy’s eyeballs, recipes from Woman’s Weekly 1982-8and screen shots from Agro’s Cartoon Connection.
Ballarat Laneways After Dark @ The Rat (9 Sept) – hangin in The Rat, feelin kewl and dat. Mining for the gold, lookin fly im told. Eating those red lollies, leavin all the brollies. Hearing mad chunes, something that rhymes with chunes. LIFE IN DA LANES IN DA RAT, YO.
Bollywood @ Mt Baw Baw (9 – 10 Sept) – more like Coolywood. No wait.. Chillywood. Nailed it.
Escape Week @ Escape Rooms (11 – 17 Sept) – when the in-laws come to town.
Murder Mystery Night @ Kryall Castle (9 Sept) – when the in-laws pop around. Every. Second. Night.
Heide Maker’s Market @ Heide (9 Sept) – Heide releases a bourbon range using ‘erbs from her lush garden.
Monsalvat Arts Festival @ Eltham (10 Sept) – I feel like Eltham would be a really nice name for a kid. Anyone agree? Oh wait, no I just think Ethan Hawke is hot. Pls continue.
Rocky Horror @ The Astor (9 Sept) – I see you shiver with antici….