22 – 24 Sept

Flying Fruit Fly Circus’ present ‘Junk’ @ Arts Centre (22 & 23 Sept) – JUNK tells the story of a modern-day boy finding himself in an abandoned junkyard inhabited by the spirits of children from the 1940’s. They teach him to play, trust, invent and take risks. Are you actually serious? This sounds scarier than IT. Not happening.
The Blizzard of Oz @ snow season in Vic (now until 8 Oct) – save money on razors, winter has officially been extended.
Royal Melbourne Show @ Showgrounds (23 Sept – 3 Oct) – there are 371 show bags this year and oh wow wtf there is one that costs $199!? Holy bajeebus. OK I want one.
Australian Poetry Slam @ State Library (22 Sept) – a night of wham bam slam ya, mam. Could have also been called Tinder tho, shrug emoj
Horrible Harriet @ Arts Centre (27 – 30 Sept) – I always imagine people named Harriet, as having sideburns.
Pop-Up Globe Theatre @ Arts Centre (21 Sept – 12 Nov) – Shakesphere like its 1614
St Kilda Arts Crawl @ St Kilda (21 – 23 Sept) – dedicated to nights that begin and end at The Vineyard. BYO knee pads.
Fuzz Fest @ Cherry Bar (22 Sept) – dedicated to nights that begin and end at Cherry Bar. BYO deo.
Meeting Points: The Hearkening @ Arts Centre (23 Sept) – are always boring and I never read them. IMPORTS: delete boss from Sprink email
Tesselaar Tulip Festival @ Monbulk (14 Sept – 10 Oct) – tousled hair and two lips, makes Mon balk.
Closet Party @ Fitzroy (22 Sept) – if it’s from Ikea, maybe we should choose another venue?
A bit na ta @ Melb Museum (22 Sept – 4 Feb) – what a wonderful phrase, a bit na ta, ain’t no passing craze
Launch Party @ Smith&Daughters (25 Sept) – Wine. Food. Good times. No footy talk. THAT IS RIGHT NO FOOTY TALK #blessed