This weekend in melbourne
Festivals
Wandiligong Nut Festival @ Wandiligong (23 Apr) – for all non-epi-pen owning citizens
Grantville Pirate Festival @ Maru Park (23 Apr) – to Err is Human. To Arr is Pirate.
Bright Autumn Festival @ Bright (22 Apr – 1 May) – peepers all over the countryside, peeping, not creeping. It is 100% ok to be a peeper.
Partay
Andy Warhol/Ai Weiwei @ NGV (23-24 April) – remaining open for 24 hours on Saturday night for those who have always wanted to say they stayed out late partying with the AWs
Watch
Anzac Day Film Screenings @ Shrine of Remembrance (25 Apr) – movies about people who were much younger, more frightened and far braver than you or I will ever be.
Australian Eurovision Preview Party @ Bella Union (24 Apr) – Rise like a Phoenix, gain a sense of Euphoria, and we will become the Heroes we are destined to be.
Penguins
World Penguin Weekend on World Penguin Day @ Phillip Island (23-24 Apr) – honouring the many lives lost during the waddling of penguins up the cliffs of Gallipoli.
eat & drink by the sprink
Two Wrongs @ 637 Chapel St, Sth Yarra – being on the Street of Strut, you’d best pull up a pew curb-side and get comfy as this is an excellent place for convo-starting. The menu is great – don’t go past the Bag of Crunchy Things – and is good for sharing ‘you have the last one, no you have the last one’ aww you guys. The drinks are fun and free flowing like the lush locks of the attentive and handsome wait staff who have been hired from model catalogues and my dreamz. A good date place that caters to the drink-and-sprint situation equally with the night that you don’t want to end. Which it won’t if these guys have anything to do with it.
Next weekend in melbourne
Groovin The Moo @ Bendigo (30 Apr)- dance with cows to music by bands who are way cooler than you. Just ask them.
Clunes Booktown @ Clunes (30 April – 1 May) – 18,000 book lovers unite to boast about the amount of first editions they own. Q: I own three first edition copies of John Wyndham’s ‘Web’ – can anyone out book-geek that????
Gippsland Arts Festival (1-30 May) – cos Gippsland.
Grampians Grape Escape @ the Gramps (30 Apr – 1 May) – Australia’s longest running food and wine festival is being headlined by Kate Ceberano this year, the perfect opportunity to rename her Grape Ceberano.
Grampians Winemakers Barrique Reserve Shiraz Auction @ Grampians (30 April) – gamble on grape juice. Producers donate a quantity of their own Shiraz wine from the previous year’s vintage to produce a unique concoction that is up for grabs.
2016 Melbourne Art Book Fair @ NGV (29Apr – 1 May) – get in before Kindles completely take over.
Workshop: Greatest ’its Presented by The Good Copy @ NGV (30 Apr) – erryone with problems using punctuation (I feel ya) can calm their apostrophe fears and get a lesson from the city’s top-grammar nerds.
The Wellness Festival @ North Melb (30April) – well, Ness do you want to go be Festive?
The Dog Lovers Show @ Royal Exhibition Building (29 Apr-1 May) – I like big mutts and I cannot lie. And ones dressed as cubes – IT IS A THING.
Disco Yoga: Rock Your Body @ Luna Park (1 May) – a charity event that mixes all the things we like: disco, yoga, Luna Park and Justin Timberlake references.
Parallel Universes, Tagine & The Sky at Night @ Yarra Valley (30 Apr) – an interactive astronomical journey through space and time. Vegetable tagine provided.
Art Red Hill @ Mornington Peninsula (29 Apr-1 May) – art scattered around the hilly home of the Red Wiggle (they live in hills, right? Or is that the other colored blob things? Like Gumby but there are four of them? COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT)
The Wine and Chocolate Festival @ Williamstown (30 Apr) – fifty artisan food and beverage suppliers, master classes and WHATEVER there are CHOCOLATE COCKTAILS
Handmade Sausage Cooking Experience @ Red Wiggles lair (from 30 Apr) – channel your inner German and get your hands up all over bratwurst sausage making.
Croatian Wine Dinner @ Mornington Peninsular (30 Apr) – eat and drink the Croatian things.
The Australian Spirit Fair @ Cumulus Up (30 Apr) – Qantas children’s choir will be lining the walls of this event . You WILL still be calling this place home, damn you.
Rihanna ‘Work’ Dance Class (26-27 Apr) – learn a dance to lyrics including ‘Meh nuh cyar if him’. RiRi use your words.
