This weekend in melbourne
The Sound of Music @ Regent Theatre (12 May – 26 Jun) – everyone’s favourite ranga, Nunny Poppins, lands ultimate bae Captain Von Plummer, surrounds herself with a gaggle of singing children and tells Hitler to stick it. Who run da world GURLS, GURLS.
Great Ocean Road Marathon @ GOR (14 – 15 May) – a great ocean road for you to run a great ocean road race along.
Luisa Miller @ Arts Centre – (16-27 May) – an opera about a woman who feels trapped by the men in her life. Leave this Kween be, bois.
Phantoms of Hamer Hall – Ghost Tour @ Arts Centre (13 May only) – literally nothing more terrifying than a phantom backstage. Unless you’re Andrew Lloyd-Webber. Then the only thing you need to worry about is what to do with the set of the sequel.
Lets Dance – A Bowie Extravaganza @ Southbank (14 May only) – put on your red shoes and dance the blues. Lets Dance.. magic dance.. in THOSE TIGHTS. All hail the goblin king.
Om nom / glug glug
High Country Harvest @ High Country (13-22 May) – get high on harvest in the country of high.
From Market to Paddock to Plate @ Bendigo (Saturdays only: 9 April – 9 Jul) – to food coma.
Max’s May Mushroom Meander @ Mornington Peninsula (14 – 29 May) – join a mushroom hunt, then gather and taste them. Don’t eat the blue ones unless you want to talk to flowers for 6hours.
Vegan Potluck @ Royal Botanical Gardens (14 May) – those who eat kale together, stay together.
Good Beer week event: Butcher & the Brewer – The Art of Home-Made Ale Sausages @ Smith Street (15 & 18 May) – a night of beer, banter and sausage production. Dear Lord give me strength to stop writing here. I need this job.
Stage events that opened last week but like the Spice Girls are still relevant today
Heathers the Musical @ Arts Centre (11 – 22 May) – high school gets way nastier than those RLStein books ever made out.
Singin’ in the Rain @ Her Majesty’s (7 May – 5 June) – Adam Garcia performing Magic Mike XXL under the stage sprinklers.
Straight White Men @MTC (6 May – 18 June) – because we need to hear more about what they have to say.
La Boheme @ Arts Centre (3-28 May) – 525,600 minutes of opera that is not the story of Rent but should be.
The Pearlfishers @ Arts Centre – (7-28) – an opera about eating fish n chips while wearing your mum’s necklace. Extra chicken salt please.
eat & drink by the sprink
Gazi @ 2 Exhibition St – with terracotta-pots rolling over the ceiling like an orange wave from Atlantis, George Calombaris does his forefathers proud delivering the best Greek food in the city, if not the country. Sometimes excessive laziness pays off, which was the case when I entrusted my order to the waiter and his pair of impressive sideburns. The dishes that were put before me I would never have normally chosen but when they did… sweet Baby J, I was glad that Mr Chops had taken the reigns. Juicy grilled prawn, baked bone marrow and wood fire chicken (what freak orders the chicken) are not really dishes you would expect to blow your tongue’s mind but that is exactly what they did – it was like they were on flavour-steroids – they were truly delectable. With taste-bud-punching food that can be shared, Gazi is da biz for dining somewhere noice with a great atmosphere, perfect for pre-theatre / footy match / work event / lunch / no reason at all. Get a group together and hit up one of the booths or impress your beau on date #4 – a night here will guarantee there to be more.
next weekend in melbourne
Run The Gap @ Halls Gap (22 May) – because I’m gappy, clap along if you feel like a room without a roof.
IT HAS A GOLDEN YELLOW SUN, AND AN ELDERLY GREY MOON @ ACCA (21 May to 24 July) – it must have really big hands to hold all of those things. Spoiler alert. It is God.
Cool Climate Wine Show @ Mornington Racecourse (23-31 May) – the after party for MTC’s Straight White Men
St Kilda Film Festival @ Arts Centre (19 – 28 May) – SKFF is back and The Espy has never been so happy. Welcome back old friends, take a set on this couch from 1973 and wait for Rockwiz to start.
Eat Street Melbourne @ Sofitel Melbourne (24 May only) – I have contacted the City of Melbourne and have been assured, the streets are a safe place to eat.
Fiesta Malaysia @ Federation Square (21 May only) – take lots of photos of food, get the hashtags right, and see 22 likes before you’ve even tasted it.
Australian Indigenous Surf Titles @ Bells Beach (20-22 May) – surfs up again down at Bells. Everyone is still looking for Bodhi but guys,he’s not coming back.