Posted: June 3, 2019 by The Sprink

‘That guy had a woman’s purse, I reckon he is a mugger’ Jamaican Jay and Sprink were on Chapel Street like it was 2002, heading to a bar that plays afrobeats (any other music can go to hell PERIODT), on their 5th date since 2018… a proper slow burn.
Sprink swivelled on her heel to see a skabby fezzball digging into a lady purse that was definitely 1) not his and 2) from Dotti.
‘Fck this’ said Sprink and chased the dude. ‘Don’t get stabbed’ called out JJ.
The exchange between mugger and Sprink went as so:
S: BABE you have my bag! I was looking for it! Where was it?
M: Oh yeah I just um found it, I was taking it to the um Police station.
S: Thanks for finding it. Where is my iPhone and my wallet? *at which point Jamaican Jay – 6ft3 and built like a brick sh*thouse – was at Sprink’s side*
M: ummm here, no, look in my pockets *empties pockets* I didn’t take anything I swear *runs off*
*We go through the bag to find her details, find a gift card for Myer then suddenly…*
Chick: MY BAG! WTF how did you find it? I was buying a drink at the bar and some random dude walked past me and then it was gone…
*as above*
Thn, The Bag Chick invited Sprink and Jamaican Jay to a party at Attik where she bought them drinks and they danced to 2012 RnB mixed in with a bit of 2006 AND OH HOW THEY DANCED.
The End.

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